Transitioning into Child/Daycare

We have a few children at Ka Hana Pono Daycare who are transitioning into outside of the home/family childcare for the first time.  Below are some tips and recommendations for all daycare parents and children.

The first few days of daycare:

• Introduce your child to childcare gradually. For example, you could firstly visit Ka Hana Pono Daycare together a few times to take a look.
• Point out what the other children in daycare are doing and talk about what is going on and why you want your child to try childcare.
• It could take several visits before your child begins to feel confident.
• Your child may feel happier when taking favourite toy or some other familiar object to childcare.

 Feel confident and OK about the change:

• Your child can sense if you are confident about leaving him or her and feel that childcare is OK. Children feel a lot more secure and can settle much more quickly if you show that this is a good place to be. They will take the lead from how you act.
• On the other hand, if you are reluctant or uncertain about leaving your child at the daycare center, this can only add to the child's anxiety.
• It is not unusual for young children to cry when their parents leave. After all, they love you and want to be close to you!
• Caregivers are skilled in comforting children and, if you choose a service which you think is best for your child, you can be sure any distress will not last long.

Saying goodbye to your child at the daycare center:

• When the time comes to leave your child, do it confidently, quickly and with a calm goodbye.
• Resist the impulse to leave without saying goodbye as your child will be frightened and distressed when they realize you have left.  Smile reassuringly and don't drag out your goodbye but do say goodbye and that you will be back.
• Your child may seem upset when you leave but most children settle down quite happily.
• If you are worried about how your child has settled down, you can always call the center later to find out.

Talk to your child about their daycare experiences:

·         Older children can give you feedback on how well the childcare center is meeting their needs. It also helps your children's development if you discuss what happens during daycare.

·         Be interested in what they have to say.

·         Ask questions even if your child cannot speak full sentences.

·         Be sensitive enough to detect if there might be a problem you need to sort out with the daycare center.

It Takes Encouragement & Patience To Teach A Child To Share

Some toddlers share without being asked and without being taught to. However, learning to share is hard for most children. Young children (1 to 3) think about themselves and what they want or need & thinking about the needs of others is the beginning of learning to share.

Children age 3 and younger should not be expected to share without encouragement. By age four, many children will share some of their things. By age six or seven, children begin to understand how to cooperate with other children.

Playing in groups gives children a chance to learn about sharing and taking turns. If your child will be playing with other children, try to prepare him in advance. Tell your toddler that you expect him to share. If he will be playing at your/his home stress this point: Just because the visiting friend plays with the toys doesn't mean the other toddler gets to keep them. Your child may feel more secure throughout the playdate if you keep reminding him that his toys will still be his when the playdate is over. It may help if you offer (in advance) to replace any toys that your guest might break—and then of course keep your promise if anything does.

If a child grabs a toy (or food or anything else) from another child, you'll need to step in immediately. Quickly and firmly, but without anger, return the toy to the child who had it first and tell your child, "No grabbing!" Then remind your child that if he wants something that someone else is already playing with, he must:

• wait his turn;
• ask for your help in setting up turns;
• ask the other child nicely and get permission to use the toy; or
• offer the other child a trade so that both children end up with something they want to play with.

If the other child will not under any conditions part with the toy that he has, or if your child cannot wait a second longer for his turn to begin, you'll need to turn down the heat even more. Though two-year-olds are not nearly as distractable as one-year-olds, you may still succeed in distracting your child. Try shifting his attention to another toy or game—and if necessary, to another place. If a particular toy becomes the sole object of full-scale warfare: take the toy away.

TIPS TO ENCOURAGE SHARING:

• Read books about sharing to the children.
• When playing "turn taking" games, be sure that each child has a chance to go first.
• It would be more effective to say something like "First you go down the slide, then Mala’e, and then Kiva. This is clearer to children than saying, "You must all take turns."
• Support and praise children when they share. For example, say, "I liked the way you let Kekoa play with that toy. You must be proud of yourself."
• Set a good example. Talk about sharing. Share with the children.

TIP:

A child may be more willing to share with a friend if you allow him to put away several toys that he just can't bear to share. Knowing that his most cherished possessions are safely stowed away may give your child a greater push toward generosity with the rest of his toys.

Be patient with your child as he learns (and repeatedly forgets) and relearns the value of sharing.

Aloha,

Aunty Gel

www.KaHanaPonoDaycare.com

Preschool vs. Daycare

Similarities

Differences

Same requirements for licensing and accreditation. You can always evaluate each using the same criteria. Cost roughly the same. Good quality preschools and daycare centers will offer activities designed to stimulate your child's physical, social and cognitive development.

Preschool is specifically designed for children between the ages of 2 and ½ and 5 or 6; Daycare is aimed at children of many different ages (infant to elementary school age). Preschools have more limited hours (typically 3 hours at a time, 2 to 5 times a week). On the other hand, some daycares offer their services during the full working day, making it a desirable choice for working moms. Curriculum: most preschool organized around a specific educational approach (i.e. Montessori, Waldorf), whereas most daycares are viewed as being more custodial than educational.

Teaching Gentleness

One of the best ways to teach gentleness is to be gentle. Resolve conflicts with words, not physical contact or force. If you catch your children physically fighting, talk with them about how else they could have taken care of their differences without hitting each other.

Refrain from spanking children. Spanking only teaches children that when adults get angered or feel pressured, it's okay to resort to physical force. Instead, take disciplinary tactics that do not involve spanking such as restricting privileges, a "time out," or making the "wrong" right, for example, having the child pay for a broken window.

Another way to model gentleness is to speak softly and use gentle words such as "use soft hands" instead of "don't touch" when talking to a young child. Encourage older children to listen to others, respect their differences, and not judge or criticize their words or actions. Involve them in doing little acts of kindness, perhaps by sharing a snack with a sibling or bringing a get-well gift to a sick friend.

Children also will learn gentleness through storybooks with kind, caring characters, especially ones who solve their problems without violence or aggressive actions. Or teach them to nurture and to care by providing them with a pet or plant. Encourage them to treat their siblings as well as adults with love.

A pet can help children learn to be gentle and patient, and how to care for a animal.

In this aggressive world, you may think you won't make a difference. However, your actions are like a pebble thrown in a pond. The circle will keep getting bigger and bigger, reaching more and more people as it grows.

Aloha,
Aunty Gel
www.KaHanaPonoDaycare.com